A Very Perdomo Weekend or: I finally got some mashed potatoes and all was right with the world.

We've long been fans of Perdomo cigars. Remember this? (There's other stuff you would be able to remember if I'd actually written about things rather than keeping them in the drafts folder, unfinished. Maybe someday I'll get to them. Or not.)

During our CigarFest bonanza weekend, we were continuously Perdomoed.* That's a good thing. No, that's a great thing!

On the first full day of our** trip, we went to the Cigars International Bethleham (PA) store for a Perdomo event.

Nick and Valentino whooping it up at the CI event.

 

Nick and his sales gurus promoted the new Small Batch, which Valentino loved and made off with a box of the Connecticut blend. (The cigar also comes in Maduro and Sun-Grown.)

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Just so you know...All three come in four sizes: Half-corona (4 x 46), Rothschild (4 1/2 x 50), Belicoso (5 x 54), and toro Especiala (5 1/2 x 54).

The Perdomo folks say the Connecticut offers “a rich smoke with a creamy complexity, slight hints of caramel and cedar, with a smooth, elegant finish.” I'm nodding enthusiastically.

From the Perdomo press release:

The Perdomo Small Batch Series takes “small batch” to the next level. Hand‐crafted from a rare collection of 10 year aged tobaccos, the Perdomo Small Batch Series is carefully blended with smaller leaves that have the perfect balance of flavor, strength, and aroma. Perdomo has created this stunning line of small premium hand‐crafted cigars by combining the finest bourbon barrel aged wrappers with these rare and exquisite 10 year aged filler tobaccos.

Limited to 3,000 boxes, the Small Batch cigars were magically created at Tabacalera Perdomo in Estelí, Nicaragua. You know how I get antsy about limited editions and how I worry Valentino won't be able to smoke what he wants because they're gone.

I, however, was more enchanted by the new salomon. Here's a picture, but more about that cigar is coming...



Before dinner treat--keep reading!

Then we went to Cigars International's CigarFest in Split Rock, PA.

Shenanigans ensued, including this:

Valentino would like me to Photoshop his eyes open.
Of course I won't, because I don't know how.
So pretend his eyes are open.
See? Way easier than Photoshop!

On the last full day of our adventure, exhausted from days and days of cigar craziness, we decided to eat a real meal while sitting down and being served. (This was my idea. I was feeling needy--for mashed potatoes.) I grabbed one of those salomons for each of the three men and we headed to  Louis Prime Steakhouse--chosen because they had an outdoor smoking area and we had some cigars for smoking. (And mashed potatoes.)

And who happens to be sitting at the next table? These folks:

The very awesome, very gracious Perdomo family.
(Yes, I stole this from Nick's Facebook page.)

Nick graciously offered us 20th Anniversary Maduros (which of course we accepted, because...der). Those were for later.

Our meal would start with the Perdomo Double Aged 12 Year Vintage Salomones (6 1/8 x 50/60) we'd purchased at CI.*** (Valentino said I couldn't have mashed potatoes for an app.)

"Nick has outdone himself this time around, shelling out three separate blends that each lay claim to 12-year-old, exquisitely fermented tobacco leaves" reported CI. "Dressed in Connecticut, Sun Grown, and Maduro wrappers, Double Aged 12-Year Vintage has a selection for every cigar lover out there. All of the tobaccos in each blend – wrapper, binder, and filler – go through an extensive 'double aging' process. They are bale-aged for ten long years before moving on to barrel-aging in charred, white oak bourbon barrels for the next two years, resulting in a refined product that’s brimming with flavor. This process ensures that the crop from 2001 has impeccable color, texture, aroma, and flavor."

Note the missing three.
Or the spot where the three used to be.

When I had originally pulled the cigars for each of them, Valentino gave me the "What are you doing?" look that I get frequently--because most of the time I really have no idea what I'm doing. But this time, I was looking to give away his very precious cigars. We both knew what I was doing.

But sitting there at dinner in the company of greatness--both the man and the cigars--Valentino said, "This was a really good idea."  I'd have bowed in agreement but 1. I was sitting, so I would have banged my head on the table (embarrassing!) and 2. I don't really like to draw attention to myself.

Of course in the process of not drawing attention to myself, I announced on Facebook where I was and what I was doing, tagging all the usual suspects, as well as Nick and Janine Perdomo. A short time later, Nick approached our table and said, "Are you Penny?"****

Busted. So much for my incognito-ness. ::shakes fist at internet and Facebook::

As I finish writing this, Valentino is coming to the end of this cigar:

Obvs, I didn't take this picture.

.... and I'm reminded that I started writing this while clad in my new Perdomo shirt, also my new favorite shirt, a gift with purchase for buying those delicious, well-timed salomones.

Cigars and Swag! But the shirt is my favorite.

 

*That's a fabulous word that I just invented. It means "being washed over with kindness, generosity, and class." You're welcome to use it. 

**"Our" throughout the story is Valentino, Caballero #2, and Honorary Caballero Mike. He should probably get a badge or sash or something.

***If you must know, three boxes may have been purchased, since only eight nestle into the box.

****I'm sure I responded, but it was probably some kind of gurgling idiot-speak, as I have a difficult time communicating like an adult. Or a human for that matter.

You knew it was inevitable: Multitudes of Sopranos references

Before I met Valentino, I'd seen maybe half a dozen episodes of The Sopranos, not in any kind of order.

Then somewhere along the line, after we'd begun living in sin (wheee!), HBO replayed the series every weeknight at 8:00. After the first episode, I was hooked. By the fifth episode, we made sure we were home by 8:00 or didn't go out until after 9:00 because the show was on. (Yes, we have the magical DVR; no, that wasn't good enough.) Also, yes, he'd already seen the whole series, because he was required to by law to view the entire series or lose his Italian status.

Even after the series concluded,* we started watching it again--although this time we could leave the house and watch it another day.  I feel sorry for the folks who had to wait months and eons between seasons. I had a hard enough time getting through the weekends Soprano-less. Plus, James Gandolfini was my hall pass,** so, yeah...

Duuuuude... RIP

Keep in mind that even though Valentino had been smoking cigars long before I met him, and has been smoking in my vicinity lo these many years, not until recently did I realize, "Hey, this stuff is both cool and interesting! Does everyone realize how cool and interesting this is?" I know: exactly like deciding The Sopranos is the coolest new show ever--long after its conclusion. (By the way, here's an interesting article about the show from Cigar Aficionado.)

And then! One day not too long ago, the planets aligned. I was roaming around eBay trying to think of good ideas for his upcoming birthday and I saw this:

I wanted this on his behalf. Not for me. Nope. Not at all.

I got excited. I bid on it and kept it a secret, which I am very, very bad at. But we were visiting his family in Pittsburgh and family stuff means no phones and no monitoring of eBay bids and I lost out. By an effing dollar.  Granted, these are obviously not for smoking, but they have an outrageous coolness factor. I had the sad.

I got over the sad, because that's how things work in Penny World.  Then! Then we saw one in the Cigars International Bethlehem store and I told him about how I almost bought it and lost out and he talked me out of buying the one right before us. For some reason, he was all, "We don't really need that..."

I shall regret this until the end of time.

I'll admit I am a sucker for limited edition anything or items with a Coolness Factor of +11.*** Right after IPCPR in Las Vegas, I started drooling at all the nifty new cigars making their way into the public eye. How do you decide whether to get all the cool new stuff or get the stuff that you know you already love? I've come up with a solution:

1. Win the lottery.
2. Convert an entire room into a humidor.

I've just been told that my goals are unrealistic.****

I was thinking about getting him this, which I saw somewhere and have to start my internet search all over again because I can't remember who had it in stock:

Now he owns this, which seems like a terrible consolation prize:

My girlfriend went to the internet and all I got was this stupid hat.

I'm writing this, sitting out in the garden, where his crop of tomatoes and basil and Italian parsley are just waaaaiting to become tomato salad and tomato sauce and caprese...but not tomato soup. That comes from Campbell's. Anyway, Valentino comes out to check his bounty***** with cigar in one hand, cutter and lighter in the other.

"What do you have there?" I ask, as I frequently do.

He shows me this:

He had them all along!! ::facepalm::

I almost don't want him to light it for two reasons:

1. Don't waste it! Except then he quotes Tony Soprano, "What use is an unloaded gun?" Or an unlit cigar. Touche.
2. The smell of basil is a serious aphrodisiac. If I keep sitting here, he's going to need to leave the cigar behind, only partially smoked.  I know you're dying to know how this scene ends, but I'll leave you with this:

 

*And I know the series ending is polarizing. you either love it or hate it. I love it, especially considering the episode title: "Made in America."

**He has not yet been replaced. Also, is it bad that I mourned him more than an acquaintance who passed at about the same time?

***Obvs out of 10. Although to be completely honest, I'd really start making choices at Coolness Factor +6.

****Not the first time I've been told that. Not even the first time this week.

*****Interpret that as you will.

Close, but no cigar. Or: Please don't sniff the cello

Valentino and I frequently hold Battle of the Mediterranean.*

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In his corner: Italy, from whence come sauces and spices and flavor and deliciousness in all forms (mostly).**

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In my corner: Portugal, from whence comes chourico. Apparently other things too, but 1. My Portuguese is watered down with English and Irish and 2. My Portuguese people are not fans of spices or flavor. Five or so years ago, when my son (who is 26? 27? Math is hard.) had his first meal at Valentino's house, his face lit up with his first bite. "Mom," he said, "This food has flavor!"

One of our favorite things to do in the summer is head to Boston to the Italian festivals and eat and smoke (him) and second-hand smoke (me) cigars and talk to people and all the other fun things that happen when you're part of the "family." How cool that we'd be able to do that with the Portuguese folks! And the Feast of the Blessed Sacrament in New Bedford, MA had just started! And we were close!

His thought bubble screamed his intentions, which, actually, they usually do. This time: Roam around the Portuguese feast and eat all the foods and smoke a cigar.

Except.

No cigar. He left the house with cutter and lighter. And not one cigar.

But food! I got excited about Valentino trying cacoila and malassadas***: the food of my people. He was not impressed with the savory (except for the chourico, everything was pretty bland), but really liked the sweet.****

As we walked around, full but kinda unsatisfied, we happened upon Rolling Stogies. Know what that meant? Cigars! We'd met up with these folks at the Boston festivals over the past few years, and we chatted with them while deciding the perfect stick for the Blessed Sacrament--something sweet and creamy to offset the spiciness in the air (although not in the food).

The Nub Connecticut won, in case you were wondering.
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While we were chatting and choosing, this thing happened.  In fact, this thing happens a lot, but I've never been this close to the horror before.

As Valentino chatted, I watched a guy in his 30s look around, obviously unfamiliar with even the basics of the cigar culture. You know how when you're watching a child, you're always unsure whether to step in or let them make their own mistakes and learn from them? That was me.

I stood back, watching this guy as he picked up the cigar, sniffed it through the cello, said, "Hmmm. That's nice." Then he held it out to his lady friend. She sniffed and made appreciative noises as well.

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As unsatisfying as sniffing a premium cigar through its cello wrapper, the Feast of the Blessed Sacrament left Valentino longing for his Italian festivals in Boston's North End.  See you soon, Fisherman's Feast and St. Anthony! (And yes, that does mean that he wins this round. And no, I'm not telling you what he wins.)


*Different from Battle of the Culinary Schools. I know it's hard to keep up, since food is involved in both. And pretty much everything else we do.

**Except desserts. No offense, but his people do not do sugar and/or dessert well.******

***Which he decided to call "Miley Cyrus" and now, my people weep.

****Because my people know the sweet stuff.

*****Cheese is not a dessert.