Cigar of the Month Giveaway or: Mutiny and the Bounty

Annnnd, we're back--from CigarFest, that is.

6:00 a.m. Doors open at 10:00 a.m.

We have lots to tell you, and many, many pictures to show you (although if you follow us on Instagram*, you can see all the pics as they pop)!

The waiting really is the hardest part.

Although with this set-up, not as difficult as you'd think.

Housemates

The whole motley crew (not the band)

The crew on the verge of entering. We were so close...
and yet so far (from all the awesome)

Inside CigarFest from the Drew Estate section

 

Part of the first day's cigar collection

After the first day, I started to worry about where we were going to put everything (above) upon our return home.

Naturally, I'm going to give a minute portion away as thanks for reading our blog, for putting up with our shenanigans, and because where the F am I going to put all this!?!?

Here's the bounty!

As Valentino reads this, he's right now in the throes of heart palpitations. He hates giving his stuff away. I love giving his stuff away.** He may be captain of this ship, but as first mate, I call for a (temporary) mutiny! So...several winners--an no, you don't get to pick what you want. And NO, you aren't getting the Feral Flying Pigs or the Angels Shares lurking in the background there. (After all, I don't want to give the poor guy an ACTUAL heart attack!)

How can you enter? Check out the Rafflecopter below! Jump through the hoops and you could be a winner!

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*Follow us at @thecigargal on Instagram and @cigargal on Twitter.

**Technically, it's OUR stuff.

The Successful Cigar Lounge (Employee edition)

Jorge Padron [source] 

"...the focus should be on quality, not quantity.  By this I mean that it is not necessarily the biggest store or walk-in humidor that makes a tobacconist great, [sic] it is the quality of the employees that make the difference. Tobacconists that understand their customers' needs and preferences, and who pair that with the perfect product for that particular smoker, are successful at what they do." 

--Jorge Padron, from the Foreword in The Tabacconist Handbook

We've been thinking a lot about cigar lounges lately: What makes one successful and another not-so-much.

In a completely unscientific and totally slipshod experiment, using the word "experiment" so loose it's probably turning tricks on a shitty city street corner, we've made a few notes about what works and what doesn't in a cigar lounge (as it relates to humidor/cigar sales only).

These brain musings focus on the sales clerk/staff only (in no particular order). We'll take on the other aspects another day.

The Good Clerk

• Wants to know what you currently smoke.
• Offers recommendations through conversation rather than hard-selling a specific cigar.
• Remains in the vicinity for quick assistance but no so close you feel you need to buy him/her a drink. 
• Understands at least the basic cigar terminology and doesn't look like a confused cheerleader when you ask for a lancero.
• Shares info about the shop if you're new, including regular events and upcoming special events.

The Not-so-good Clerk

• Know everything about everything and anything you say is wrong. 
• Holds the world championship title in oneupsmanship.
• Follows you so closely that onlookers mistake you for newlyweds.
• Makes you look up a price in the humidor. 
• Is constantly surprised by the stock.
• Is too busy talking to other patrons to acknowledge your presence. (This is cousin to the clerk who stays on the phone without even making eye contact.) 
• Obviously works on commission or needs to meet a sales quota because you aren't getting past him unless you hand over your wallet or at least your AmEx. 

The Head-banging-on-counter/why-does-this-person-have-a-job? Clerk

• Doesn't greet you when you walk into the shop.
• Consistently mispronounces company/brand names--Olivia cigars, anyone?
• Goes missing when you need to pay. 
• Doesn't listen.
• Says "I just work here." 
• Tells you to give him a flat amount of cash where he's sitting rather than ringing you up. You don't need a receipt, right?
• Obviously steals from the owner. (Do you tell the owner? This is a post for another day.)

You've surely seen most, if not all, of these scenarios at one point or another.  Join us in applauding the Good Clerk. Thank the guy or gal personally. Then go one step further and tell the shop owner or manager about the great service.

If you own a shop, we recommend checking out these books:

Available for purchase here.

 

Available here.

More than the number of cigars your humidor holds or how many special events and dinners you hold, excellent customer service is what brings people back to your shop. Make sure every customer has an excellent visit. After all, you never know who they could recommend visit--or discourage from visiting your shop.

CMA--No, not the Country Music Awards

CMA as in Cigar Media Association.

Guess who just entered the club?

Me.

Stop laughing.

I started this dang blog about a year and a half ago(ish) because I had a couple of great ideas for books, but in order to give my characters credibility, I needed to know more about the (cigar) world they live in. So I started researching.

You say "watching TV." I say "researching."

At the same time, Valentino and I started going to more in-shop events, dinners, spending more time investigating new cigar lounges, hanging at our close-to-home lounge, and travelling for bigger events (for example, CigarFest in some remote town in Pennsylvania, the CFCF Havana Nights fundraiser in Miami, and we JUST returned from Nicaragua). Sometimes funny things happened, sometimes interesting things happened, sometimes nothing happened but a good cigar wafted by, and that would spark a story just as much as a grand-doing.

I'm a storyteller by nature. (You should buy my books. Just sayin'.)

Superfriend Karl (Hi Karl!) says I'm not a cigar blogger; I'm a cigar storyteller. He's right. I don't care about the first third or any third for that matter, although if it's notable for one reason or another, I'll certainly tell you about it. I like the stories behind the cigars or the things that happen in my own little cigar world.  Is it cool to meet the owners and blenders? Yep. A round of picture-taking just to flaunt meeting them? Nope. But! If a story occurs during shenaniganning, then abso-kerflunkin-lutely you'll hear about it!

The actual Litto, actually dancing.
I guess it's the Litto Shuffle.

So what started as me needing a place to keep all the learnin' has become a home for our adventures.

Because I'm a professional writer at heart, I aim to answer questions before a reader asks them-- you'll notice I like to include the cigars' stats along the way--just so I'm providing a clear picture. The CMA's mission is "Providing the cigar industry with an accredited group of individuals that can produce accurate media to consumers and retailers." One of the curses that comes with writing professionally AND teaching people to write at the college level is the need to be a diligent researcher who uses reliable sources and credits those sources. So that happens and sometimes it takes a long time in order for it to happen, which is why postings are sometimes sporadic."* [nb: Urgh. The white blocks are an added bonus. No extra charge.]

The crazy themes and pictures? Those are to make Valentino laugh.** (Hopefully, you laugh too.)

As a new member of the CMA, Love of the Leaf joins these awesome online publications:

• Blind Man’s Puff
• The Cigar Authority
• Cigar Coop / Stogie Geeks
• Cigar Dojo
• Cigar Inspector
• Cigar Federation
• Cigar Smoke
• Cigar Jukebox
• Cigar Vixen
• Covering Your Ash
• Fat Ash Magazine
• Half Ashed
• Kiss My Ash Radio
• Love of the Leaf (You are here.)
• Nice Tight Ash
• Stogies on the Rocks
• Stogie Press
• Toasted Foot

You should check them out. They're totally cool and joining them makes me feel like I just received a sparkly crown. Or I get to sit at the cool kids' lunch table. Or both. Yes! Definitely both! Simultaneously!! I'd do the happy dance, except...

This is literally me.

Okay, then. Figuratively.

*You know how when you go to look at one  video on YouTube and five hours later you're still watching cat videos? I'm the nerd version of that.

**And me laugh too. 

September Cigar of the Month: Rocky Patel

Last week,* Rocky Patel came to town, landing** at Broadway Cigars.

Broadway Cigars in Providence, RI.

Many men (and a few ladies--Hi Denise!) gathered for this rare Providence, RI sighting.

Just some of the usual suspects.***

And also one of the world's coolest dudes. Hi Brian!

Rocky was **** gracious, generous with his time, and funny--AND he put up with Will the Travelling Owl's willfulness, so in our book, he should be sainted.

The little bastard and Rocky

Of course, he also hung with Valentino for a bit, and they laughed it up like BFFs. (Not even kidding. I pity the guy who came up to Rocky and said, "Now who are you?")

Like Valentino's shirt? You can get one just like it here!

If you live on Planet Earth and have even taken a peek into the cigar world, you've heard the name Rocky Patel. Here's a spot of backstory so you can appreciate why his name is synonymous with cigars and you really only need to say "Rocky" and everyone knows who you mean.

Patel, er, Rocky, a former Los Angeles entertainment and liability lawyer, developed a fascination with cigars during the mid-1990s boom. After helping found the Grand Havana Club in LA, he invested in cigar manufacturing and the product--and his name--sailed to the annals of cigar history.

That beginning came in 1996, when the cigar world welcomed Rocky and business partner Phil Zhengi's Indian Tabac Company's**** "fresh ideas, bold packaging, and fuller cigars" and since then, his perfect tobacco blending and blending with smokers of his premium cigars is known throughout the community. [source]

Speaking of blending, at which Rocky excels, these were accidentally purchased during the Broadway Cigars event...

A smorgasborg of cigars!
What's the cigar equivalent of nom-nom-nom?

Also during the event, Rocky Patel (the company) rep Max Bichler provided some cigars to give away to you guys! Cigars that haven't been released to the public yet!

And we also got Rocky to sign a couple of boxes for you!

These boxes are empty, but they're still signed!

What's in the box?
Nothing. Not. A. Thing.
(Not kidding.)

In addition to what you see here, we're working on adding to the collection--more Rocky Patel cigars--we just couldn't finalize the secret switch in the back room of a speakeasy by "Dear god I have to announce next month's giveaway soon!" o'clock. But there will be more! Pinky swearsies!

So for now, we know there will be two first-prize winners. But of course we can't leave it at that! Stay tuned for The Adding of More Prizes.


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*Hahahaha. As if I did something in a timely manner.

**Not landing landing, as if his plane gently set down on Broadway's roof... Metaphorical landing.

***

In this picture,
they look like extras from a Sopranos episode.

****I'm sure he still is; after all, he's only been gone a few days.

*****Earlier this year, the company announced Indian Tabac's demise.

Where we may be...maybe: A three-hour tour

Last year's event was a two-hour tour and that wasn't nearly long enough to chat with everyone you know and love (or want to know and love) and eat delicious foods and smoke one of the many amazing cigars you received.

 

So this year, a three hour tour...

 

 

 I'll be part of "and the rest," so as to remain incognito.  I probably won't be wearing gingham--although I am technically a professor, so there's that...

 

Anyway, join us (maybe) and a ton of cool kids (definitely) on Boston Harbor for the Massachusetts Tobacco Retailers Association (MTRA) cigar cruise. In addition to being a super fun event (if you remember to take your Dramamine), you're also helping raise money for some serious legislation ass-kicking.*



 

Even if we wind up not going, you definitely should! It will still be fun even if we aren't there!

Don't forget to pack and bring your entire wardrobe like Thurston Howell III and his lovely wife Lovey.

Get your tickets here:
The Owl Shop (This was not named after Will, no matter what he tells you.)
416 Main St Worcester - (508)-753-0423

Cigar Room II (Hi Karin!)
378 Walnut Street Ext. Agawam- (413) 285-8078

Old Firehouse (Hi John!)
116 Rock St, Fall River - (508) 678-2185

 L. J Peretti
2 1/2 Park Sq, Boston - (617) 482-0218

Watch City Cigar
497 Worcester Rd, Framingham - (508) 628-0112

Cigar and Lounge
56 Dexter Ave, Watertown - (617) 393-1645

Brennan's Smoke Shop (Hi Geoff!)
909 N Main St Brockton - (508) 897-0777
1 Broadway Taunton - (508) 823-5773
6 Broad St Bridgewater - (508) 697-9990
1510 Route 44 , Raynham - (508) 828-5773
24 Main St Plymouth - (508) 746-5711
308 Brockton Av, Abington - (781) 871-4388

Premium 70/70 Cigars (Hi Nolan!)
875 State Rd, Westport - (508) 677-0333

 Red Lion Smoke Shop
93 Washington St, Salem - (978) 745-2050

Harrington Wine and Liquors
10 Summer St, Chelmsford- (978) 256-2711

Victory Bar and Cigar
56 Shrewsbury St, Worcester (508) 756- 4747


*There's probably a more politically correct way to say this, but I don't want to.

Where we'll be: Barnstorming...er, BarnSmokering

First of all, I can NOT get the name of this correct, so if you would all start calling this event the Barnstormer, I'd really appreciate it. K? Thanx.

 

 

So one day, while we hung at Twins Smoke Shop, an email popped up, announcing these Drew Estate tickets going on sale. Well, this isn't my first rodeo, or barn raising, or cigar event, whatever, and I knew immediate action was needed. No--required. I didn't ask Valentino if he wanted to go and sent a text to Caballero #2 but didn't wait for his response. I just bought the damn tickets, which sold out in no time.

 

So we'll be here, the three caballeros and me, hanging with the Drew Estate folk. (Apparently there will be 300+ other folks here at the barnstormer too. What? Dammit. Barn Smoker.)

 

If you didn't know, "[b]arnstormers were pilots who flew throughout the country selling airplane rides and performing stunts; Charles Lindbergh first began flying in this capacity." [source]

An actual barnstormer:
A Curtiss JN-4 "Jenny" in flight over Central Ontario c. 1918
[source]

While we won't be getting plane rides, we will be getting:

• (1) Liga Privada "A"
• (1) Liga Privada Ratzilla
• (1) Liga Privada Velvet Rat
• (1) Liga Privada No. 9
• (1) Liga Privada T52
• (1) Nica Rustica “El Brujito”
• (1) Undercrown Belicoso
• (1) ACID Toast

Apparently, the sampler pack also includes "custom Barn Smoker swag, Drew Estate matches, and more goodies."

 

Plus! A BBQ dinner! Beverages!

 

And a portion of ticket sales will be donated to Cigars For Warriors, so that's an added bonus for everyone!
 

Visit the Cigars for Warriors webpage!

Tatuaje is a super-fun word to say. Or: Is it hot in here or humid or...?

Once upon a time, Valentino and I had a few small humidors spattered around the house, holding a respectable amount of cigars. Somehow, we worked our way up to seven stuffed desktop humidors. At that point, we had two choices:

1. Stop buying cigars (hahahaha. As if.)
2. Get ourselves a stand-up humidor

We obviously chose door #2.

 

That 2,000-count humidor filled itself up quite nicely and right quick.  We needed another.

 

We ordered another. It arrived and...

 

 

 

 ...we nestled it into Casa Awesome. Then, we went outside and when we returned to joyous central air, we found that second 2,000-count humidor full.* Sigh.

 

Recently, SuperFriend Kurt Kendall, created the most gorgeous shop, humidor, and lounge when he (literally) moved Twins Smoke Shop to new digs. As a result of that relocation, a few display humidors were stranded at the old place. Because we are generous souls, we and Caballero #2 offered to adopt them. Commence negotiations, mayhem, and shenanigans, because that's how we roll.
 

Bonus points to me for this killer segue: The three caballeros and I hopped** into the HerfMobile and rolled our way to aforementioned humidors.***

Many of you have seen this truck
at various (understatement) cigar events.

After a quick trip to Dunkin Donuts for people-fuel, I said, "You're probably wondering why I brought you all here," while stuffing a jelly munchkin into my mouth, so it sounded like "Gru prablay worworworing un brut un uh he." I wiped the powdered sugar from my fingers right onto my jeans**** and handed each of boys one of these:

The ones I gave them were unlit, of course.

 

You say, "Hey, is that the most awesome Tatuaje Havana VI Artistas?"

 

I say hold your horses; I'm getting to that.

As I bossily thrust the medium red-banded torpedos into their faces, Caballero #2 said, "Hey, this is a Tatuaje. Yum. Which one is it?" (Usually he can identify a cigar at a zillion paces, but in his defense, he was charged with navigating through outer-Boston traffic.)

Always afraid of upsetting my epic-level nerdiness and conveying incorrect information, I consulted the mighty internets for cigar details. (Hahahaha. I could barely write that without laughing so hard Diet Coke came out of my nose!) Anyway, thanks to the folks at Cigar Coop for the info (unless otherwise noted), here's the dealio on why the fab Tatuaje Havana VI Artistas is so named:

1. The cigar is made in traditional Cuban “Havana” style, complete with a "beautiful Cuban triple cap," according to the Tatuaje website. 
2. "As for the 'VI', this goes back to the fact that originally there were six vitolas made available (since then there have been more)." 
3. And pay attention to the first letters of these original core line vitolas--

• Hermosos – Corona Gorda: 5 5/8 x 46
• Angeles -Petite Corona: 4 5/8 x 42
• Victorias – Corona Especial: 6 x 38
• Artistas – Torpedo: 6 1/8 x 52
• Nobles – Robusto: 5 x 50
• Almirantes – Churchill: 7 x 47

The Havana line-up. <--See what I did there?
::pats self on back for unplanned cleverness::
[source]

 

So the answer to "Is that the Tatuaje Havana VI Artistas?" is Yes. Yes it is, courtesy of our BFFs at Famous Smoke, who sent them to me and said, "Howzabout you get your Band of Merry Men to smoke these mofos?" <--All my words, their idea.

Speaking of words, humidor retrieval day also included a continuous stream of verbal volleyball because these boys play rough with the cleverness and words--except when they're talking about this Nicaraguan-born Tatuaje, included in Cigar Aficionado's 2014 Top 25. Then they're all hearts and rainbows and sparkles and unicorns. Manly unicorns, of course, but still unicorns.

 

By the way, the wrapper is Ecuadorian Habano, binder and filler Nicaraguan. The Garcia family, yes, they of My Father Cigars, creates these 6.12 x 52 "Tatuaje Red Label," which Cigar Aficionado describes as "rich, toasty and earthy quality and that leather note found in many Tatuajes."

In an interview with CA, Pete Johnson said about the Garcias, "They’re like family. We kind of grew up with each other. We really made a life for ourselves by doing something together. They give me credit all the time and it’s a two-way street. I praise what they do. I think they’re phenomenal cigarmakers, and they take the time to teach me. They took the time to actually explain the history of what they did, and why they roll the way they roll. That’s why I made a commitment to work with them only."  We recommend you follow the link to check out the whole interview.

Anyway, Valentino proclaimed this Tatuaje Havana a fab morning smoke, which thankfully worked just fine, as I demanded cigar ignition soon after truck ignition, so about 9:30 in the morning.

Valentino looks like he's plotting world domination.
Or falling asleep. Why so early, mornings?

 

As all three caballeros oohed and ahhed over their cigars, I knew Valentino seethed inside.  Even though these guys are besties, he hated I gave away "his" most delicious cigars (a frequent occurrence). You'd think them the world's last few Tatuaje Havana VI Artistas ever ever ever. I promised him an internet visit to Famous for more! Wheeee! Tragedy averted! Internal conflict resolved!

Caballero #2, HerfMobile owner,***** driving.
Pinky swear his eyes were open during most of the drive.

 

Caballero #3. This was his second partaking.
I demanded he smoke one the previous week at Habanos:

We were listening to my brother's band, Shuttlecock,
which plays at Habanos every Wednesday.

Insert here a series of wonky images as the three gentlemen lifted and organized and planned and coaxed the humidors into the U-Haul. Picture me off to the side, sitting on the empty shop's front stoop, watching, for I am a delicate flower.

Now add more fun through a time-lapse activity montage and the new-to-us humidor is in place, cleaned up, and I, as house humidor manager, happily fill and organize this:

Soooo purty...and organized!

You can't see it in the picture--because it hadn't yet arrived upon the quick snapshot,****** but this is making its way to Casa Awesome:

 

By the way,  Tatuaje, Spanish for "tattoo" and created by Pete Johnson in 2003, is super fun to say. Repeat after me: "tat-oo-ah-hey." 

What's that? You want to know why tatuaje? Pete explains during that Q&A with Cigar Aficionado, "The name came about because Robby Levin, Carlos Fuente, Wayne Suarez, they all gave me the name 'Tattoo Pete.' I had tattoos, but my OpusX tattoo really stood out. I kept on looking at different brand names, then I thought 'let’s try Tatuaje.' People said you can’t pronounce the word, but I think it worked to my advantage. People would say, 'do you have those Tats? Do you have those tattoo cigars?'"

Soon enough, all three caballeros and I will have those tattoo cigars; I think they'll fit into that new humidor quite nicely, don't you?
 

 

*Really, not that much of an exaggeration.

**Me? Hoisted, actually, as the HerfMobile stands no less than one thousand feet high. A winch was required for loading and a slide for unloading.

***Kurt knew we were coming, obvs. We didn't organize a caper or heist, although it would have been hilarious had we done that, starting with me telling them to go in the wrong direction. Hilarious, I tell you.

****And Valentino's head exploded.

*****Although can someone really ever own the HerfMobile? More like the HerfMobile owns you.

******Obvs, I took the pic. Had Valentino used his mad photography skills, you'd still be gazing at the humidor's beauty and not reading this.

T minus 6 days until my next iROBUSTO column or: Caution--many newly-created words ahead!

The first part of that title is me looking at my day-late show-offiness optimistically.

Remember how I highlighted Cigarnival cool activities?* That got me thinking about giant herfs** and the benefits of attending one (or more).

With every Facebook post proclaiming "Everything is Awesome,"*** I had more of the sad for missing this year's Cigarnival.

The other day, we took Caballero #2's HerfMobile to New Hampshire (from Massachusetts, so an hour and a half or so jaunt) and as he drove, smoking some of the event's loot, I wondered what I actually missed, so I started making a list in my head. (I like to make lists a lot. Sometimes I even look at them again.) Also in attendance for the ride: Our pal Mike, who heretofore shall be known as Caballero #3. When we see him this weekend, he shall be properly ordained, so let's keep it between us until after the 4th, okay?

L to R: Newly-anointed Caballero #3,
Carlito Fuente, and Caballero #2

And because fair is fair, here's one of
our hero with Carlito

Full disclosure: I didn't attend the Famous Smoke megaherf because Valentino played in a golf tournament that weekend. I knew I'd never keep up with Caballero #2; he is a world-class socializer and master cigar passer-outterer and CRA**** signer-upperer, so he'd be busy doing those things. I require a more, um, hands-on handler, because given the choice between sitting in a corner reading and gladhanding...well, let's just say I always have a book with me. No need to tell me; I already know: I am a world-class nerd.

So this week's column for iROBUSTO is 5 Things about why you should attend a big-ass herf. (Or something along that line.) You should check it out! In the meantime, I have to go think of something incredibly clever for next week... Damn, the Thursdays come around quickly, don't they? Until then, I leave you with this:

*One of my favorite words, thanks mostly to this:

[source]

**Not the ones that roam the land, seeking the souls of people who say they're allergic to foods but aren't, just to hop on the bandwagon. What? That's not an alternate definition of herf?? I could have sworn that was a thing. Can we make it one? Even if it's as elusive as a unicorn, just knowing it's out there somewhere thrills me.

***


****Cigar Rights of America. If you aren't a member, you should become one, stat. (I just double-checked my member status before I wrote that. Didn't want to be a hypocrite. All paid up!)