Thursday, August 28, 2014

Valentino and the Neighbor who Knows Things

So this happened today:

Valentino goes next door to chat with the neighbor about lawn boundaries and mowing and other manly, territorial things. As they're chatting, our hero fiddles with the Cuellar Connecticut Kreme in his hand. 

"You know, those can cause cancer," our friendly neighbor says.

"I don't inhale," Valentino proclaims, not willing to get into a row with someone who lives so close to Chez Awesome.

"Oh, you don't?" he says, surprised. "But you can still get cancer in the mouth."

"Oral cancer? How do you know?"

"I'm a cancer researcher. Google me when you go in."

Valentino temporarily abandons all smoking plans and heads to the Google. Cancer researcher? Hahahaha. Yeah, right.

No, right. How about the leading cancer researcher at a major cancer organization located in a nearby Ivy League university? And editor of scientific magazines. And lead scientist of scientificy things. And writer of books. And winner of major awards. (I'm being vague on purpose, to protect his privacy.) But we saw videos on YouTube of him explaining how stress affects DNA and makes fighting cancer more difficult. (The embedded PowerPoint presentation was actually darned interesting.)

When he just told the story at the cigar lounge, what question did everyone want answered? Waaaait for it...

"So did you blow smoke in his face?"

I love our friends. 

And yes, he did go back and enjoy the Kreme while working in the yard and breaking up the box of the new 2,000-count humidor. 

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